Gay For Dummies
Posted on February 17, 2008
Freezing rain here this a.m., so I’m actually forced to stay put and type out a few e-mails I’m behind on. Not that it’s a bad thing, but the albino catfish are annoyed I haven’t replaced one of the lights in their tank, which was on my list today. Have you ever seen an irritated albino catfish? They don’t say much, but their stare… Oh, yes. Their stare…
So, I just figured I’d check in with everybody and announce a couple of things:
1) The publisher has shortened the title of the book to simply “Lord of the Loins” to shamelessly cash in on the whole “Lord of the Rings” thing. I can’t wait to see the cover they come up with. Personally, I liked my first title, “Gay For Dummies”, but I didn’t want to get sued. I may not have much, but I’m not willing to part with what I do have and I feel certain their lawyer wouldn’t get as much enjoyment out of my autographed Duran Duran CD collection as I do…if I had an autographed Duran Duran CD collection. I don’t.
2) Some early feedback on the book has started to trickle in and it scares me. The comment in that “I’m-not-going-to-blow-smoke-up-your-derriere” way is that it’s achieved everything (or mostly everything) I’d hoped for. The scary part is that someone who shall remain unnamed (I promised Madonna I wouldn’t namedrop) said that it’s better than the first book. Damn you, Kylie Minogue! Could there be anymore pressure in writing the next one? I set the bar with the first book and now I’ve raised it?? Okay…so didn’t mean to do that no matter what Bette Midler accuses me of.
3) The publisher has graciously moved the publication date of the book up to the end of May so that I can hit a few of the Pride Fests with it. Heck, if they set me up with a little table in one of the beer tents, it should sell out in no time!
4) I’ve sold my soul to a minion of the devil, bit the bullet and worked out a deal to have a professional company develop a website for me. I’ll send out another e-mail as soon as it’s up. We’re currently waiting for me to approve the final written content (I wrote it myself…heh heh), cover art from the publisher and me to decide on and take an author pic. I’m not photogenic. I thought about asking Hong Kong actor/singer Edison Chen to pose with me, but considering the pictures on the Net of the interesting positions he was caught posing in, it would most likely work against me. Look the story up if you don’t know who I’m talking about. Edison made a plea for people not to download the pictures. Oops. My bad.
That’s pretty much it. I hope you are all happy, healthy and many other adjectives that start with “h”. Oh, and please, please, please send some warmer weather to the Detroit area!
Kristoffer Gair (who formerly wrote under the pseudonym Kage Alan) is the Detroit-based author of Honor Unbound, A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To My Sexual Orientation, Andy Stevenson Vs. The Lord Of The Loins, Gaylias: Operation Thunderspell, several short stories featured in anthologies (to be combined in a forthcoming book), the recently re-published novella Falling Awake, its sequel, Falling Awake II: Revenant and Falling Awake III: Requiem.