How To Rant & Sabotage Yourself To The Amusement Of Others

Posted on August 24, 2015

Sitting around with friends and having a little bitch session can be fun and a wonderful way to get crap off your chest. I imagine accountants complaining “OMG! Did you hear the number my boss threw out on the fly? Did he even look at it before he said it? I don’t think he even put the decimal in the right place.” Or whatever accountants say. Authors complain about our muses, family members, computers, writing programs, and, sometimes, reviews. Am sure reviewers complain about their family members, computers, and, sometimes, books they’ve had to read. It’s normal, right? But you don’t bitch about it to the general public.

One of the big things many of my online friends have been hit with are pictures or posts getting reported. Heck, I’ve had one of each reported. For what? Containing nudity. The post someone reported is this one: “When your gecko is broken, does that mean you have a reptile dysfunction?” Yes, someone actually reported it. The picture that was reported for nudity was one of me, fully clothed, standing on the beach with nobody else around me. You see, if enough people report you for stupid shit like that, you’ll eventually have your account blocked while it’s investigated.

It’s annoying, right? But it can go beyond that. I have a friend who released a movie and when it got released for sale on Amazon, enough people complained that it contained offensive material that Amazon yanked it and killed all momentum for its launch. They found nothing offensive about it, but they had to investigate it.

So, someone on Facebook who’s friends with a couple hundred writers (I’m one of them) decided to announce they were tired of pictures of men and women showing up on their news feed that contained either pubic hair or rear ends. Okay, I don’t have a problem with pictures like that, but I also don’t have a problem with that person having a problem with it. What I have a problem with is this person then goes on to state they have complained to Facebook and the response is that it doesn’t violate FB standards. Complain in this case means he/she has reported these images.

In a comment below the post, the person states that they have asked the people posting the pictures to post “less shit” and that the response has been to label him/her “too conservative.” They don’t want to unfriend the people posting the photos, but don’t like being told they can’t dictate what someone can or cannot post. Never mind it’s possible to click on a post and select “Hide Post (and see fewer like this).” But here’s the thing…we now know who one of the people is who’s reporting pictures. What do you think is going to happen? If they aren’t going to unfriend us, we’re going to unfriend them.

The other one that made me go “huh???” this week was an author making a public rant about sending a large number of books out for reviews (why they aren’t sending out e-books, I don’t know), getting so-so reviews, and then getting requests from those same reviewers for the next one in a series. That in itself isn’t necessarily horrible, though it could have been put a bit more PC or not even been said in public at all, but this person then states regarding so-so reviews, “cause I get plenty of those from people who actually buy the book.” They really didn’t do themselves any favors mentioning that.

No author likes to receive a shit review and we don’t like the so-so ones either. On the flipside, I don’t believe that a reviewer likes to give a shit review or even a so-so review because they’ve spent their time reading the damn thing hoping it was going to be worth it for them. The fact they’re requesting another book from you suggests they liked enough of the first one to be hopeful for the second one. And if they like the second one, you’ve just made a new friend who will look for your third book. But ranting against them like that? You probably just lost a couple if they happened to read your public post.

Think about what you’re doing and saying, folks. And if you happen to hear of anybody with reptile dysfunction, don’t report them. It’s that simple.

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Kristoffer Gair (who formerly wrote under the pseudonym Kage Alan) is the Detroit-based author of Honor Unbound, A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To My Sexual Orientation, Andy Stevenson Vs. The Lord Of The Loins, Gaylias: Operation Thunderspell, several short stories featured in anthologies (to be combined in a forthcoming book), the recently re-published novella Falling Awake, its sequel, Falling Awake II: Revenant and Falling Awake III: Requiem.

8 Responses to “How To Rant & Sabotage Yourself To The Amusement Of Others”

Dorien Grey says:
August 24, 2015 at 8:55 am
Sage words, as always. Though I feel “a reptile dysfunction” should have been banned under the “no groaner-puns” rule.

D

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Brent Seth says:
August 24, 2015 at 9:55 am
I would think that someone who is either an author, or just a follower of many authors, would understand the potential risk of censorship. Everyone has the right to remove offensive material from their own news feed, I’ve done that plenty of times myself, but to assume you have the right/authority to remove it from everyone’s is beyond arrogant.

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Katherine Trick says:
August 24, 2015 at 10:38 am
People need to get more of a clue. FB makes it easy enough to hide posts you don’t want to see, so I never understand this whole “reporting” of supposed offensive posts. Just click the hide button and “tada”…… it’s gone. I subscribe to the school of thought…..”if you don’t like it, don’t look”. People have a right to their opinion, but not the right to force it upon others.
Good blog today, Kris.
PS– I like the reptile dysfunction joke, by the way. Not offensive, just funny (if you have a sense of humor, that is).

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JP Adkins says:
August 24, 2015 at 10:58 am
The other day I had someone post that he was sick of reporting all the “ass and pube” pictures he has coming on his timeline. I told him that if he didn’t like what was coming through on his feed, to stop following the people. This isn’t rocket science people.

There are a couple people that I know in real life that I follow because I want to keep up with the batshit crazy coming from the world. They are reasonably intelligent and have reasons for feeling the way they do. I may not agree and sometimes believe that I have fallen down the rabbit hole. Yet, I realize that is because of my beliefs and they would think those were just as crazy as I believe theirs to be.

As always, thank you Kris for bringing well written, interesting topics to talk about.

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Kris says:
August 24, 2015 at 2:32 pm
I still maintain that I’d like to be able to see who is reporting things so that we have a chance to unfriend and block them. It seems only fair.

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Patricia M Hebel says:
August 24, 2015 at 11:54 am
Isn’t it always some Debbie Downer(s) trying to dictate what they want the world to be. Don’t they realize there are ways of not looking or hearing stuff without wrecking it for others?

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Kris says:
August 24, 2015 at 2:33 pm
Most people I’ve met online are respectful. But there are some who just raise eyebrows.

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Jayden Brooks says:
August 25, 2015 at 1:31 am
I can’t understand why FB doesn’t have a default unfriend action when a post/picture is reported – to protect both parties. Seems to me it would eliminate abuse of the system, and save them a crap ton of time investigating repeat complaints from trolls out to harass certain accounts.

For the person who finds reporting the best method of controlling his/her “friends” posting habits – Duuuuude, grow the heck up, and learn to use the tools FB provides to save you from all the naughty you can’t cope with. Look into the unfollow feature, it’s a nifty tool where you remain friends with a person but don’t see their posts unless you go looking for them. Meh.