The First Entry in My Jedi Journal at Age 13

Posted on January 28, 2013

It’s not fair. My husband’s birthday is coming up and he’ll be back at work and away from home again on that day. He’s typically either in Hong Kong for it or he’s away. However, his father has been moved to a rehabilitation facility, so the latest crisis should be over. Should. Am going to keep wishing on that so it sticks and the man heals. In the meantime, we’ve been going through tons and tons of boxes in our storage area and getting rid of crap we haven’t looked at or used in a decade. It’s in one of these boxes I came across a Jedi Journal my parents bought for me back on my 13th birthday. Want a peek inside?

The inscription says “To Kris, Happy 13th birthday! How’s it feel to finally be a teenager? Great, huh? We love you! Dad & Mom (June 19, some year I’m not going to tell you or lie about).

Oh, yes, how great it felt to be a teenager. Sure, the ol’ orgasms were no longer dry, but I had to start using deodorant, acne was making an appearance and my body was doing stranger things to itself than I’d been doing with friends the last 5 years. It is NOT a fun time in a male’s life. Ask any one of us. We’ll tell you.

I made a total of ten entries. Have I reread them? No. Most of them aren’t very long, which surprises my husband since he figures I was fairly long-winded even back then. I was. I just didn’t write it all down. Now, had I known him back then, I’d have simply told him in person because it would have driven him batshit crazy. Imagine the comments people would make watching a 9 year-old half Asian boy telling a 13 year-old to shut up, quit talking and let him get back to figuring out how to take over the world. And yes, it would have happened just like that. Anyway, let’s have a gander at the first entry.

“Dear Diary,

Today was special for me. It was my birthday and Father’s Day. I got one big Pac-Man beach towel, one summer shirt, one book, and one deodorant stick from Grandma. I got two summer shirts and a Return of the Jedi portfolio from my Aunt Patty. I got a Mini-Turbo Blow Drier and name-tape from my Aunt Susie. And from my parents I received two cassette tapes, seventy-one game tokens, one pair of great designer jeans, one nice looking shirt, and one sweater.

I also got a bunch of stuff to bring to camp with me such as a Return of the Jedi toothbrush, toothpaste, OFF, soap, and a bag of peanuts.

I had a white cake with vanilla frosting.”

Not quite the letters my friend and fellow author Dorien Grey used to write home to his parents when he was in the Navy, but at least I gave a few details. See what I mean about needing deodorant at that age, though? Apparently those around me felt I needed it. The amusing thing about the other gifts is the blow drier (cuz it’s all about the hair with us gay boys), designer jeans (cuz it’s all about our ass’s presentation with us gay boys) and having nice shirts (cuz it’s all about giving the boys something nice to look at on the way down to staring at our gay boy ass). And yes, I loved going to the arcade back then. Games only took a single token to play for a few minutes, not four tokens as time went on, which is just ridiculous.

Now, my parents sending me off to band camp (yup, I have a few of those “This one time…at band camp…” stories I’ve never told) with a Return of the Jedi toothbrush isn’t slightly bit prone to target me for an ass-kicking, is it? How geeky was I? At least I know it didn’t have a picture of one of those fucking Ewoks. Honestly, what was Lucas thinking? And a bag of peanuts, huh? Oh, yeah. I’m sure that made me popular with the other campers. “Nuts?” Then again, maybe it did.

Okay, I got a kick out of seeing that I had a white cake with vanilla frosting. I still love those and sometimes make them myself. Can never have too much vanilla. I did have to mix it up for friends, though, and either add cherry frosting or change it to a cherry chip cake with vanilla frosting. My hubby loves chocolate. He can have it. I want vanilla.

Did any of you keep a diary or journal when you were a kid?

________________________
Kristoffer Gair (who formerly wrote under the pseudonym Kage Alan) is the Detroit-based author of Honor Unbound, A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To My Sexual Orientation, Andy Stevenson Vs. The Lord Of The Loins, Gaylias: Operation Thunderspell, several short stories featured in anthologies (to be combined in a forthcoming book), the recently re-published novella Falling Awake, its sequel, Falling Awake II: Revenant and Falling Awake III: Requiem.

6 Responses to “The First Entry in My Jedi Journal at Age 13”

CR Guiliano says:
January 28, 2013 at 10:48 am
I never kept a diary, but I have lots and lots of pictures. A got a camera (silly child-like one) when I was about five. Better ones as I got older. Lots of pictures. *blushes* Some pretty weird…I mean, who takes pictures of their habitrail and swingset? Me, apparently.

I think it is so fun to see old things from when you were younger, though I tend to roll my eyes at some of the outfits my parents dressed me in as a child. I did NOT rock the 60′s look…at all.

Thanks for the little insight into newly teen Kris. *hugs*

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Kris says:
January 28, 2013 at 12:51 pm
I have a ton of pictures, too. It’s a matter of finding the time to scan them all in. I did upload a number of them onto Facebook in various folders, but I still have many to go.

Embrace the pictures! You should upload them. =)

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Vastine Bondurant says:
January 28, 2013 at 11:30 am
I kept diaries but didn’t hold on to them. Now, after seeing this, I wish I had.

I so enjoyed yours. That was so precious.
And sending healing wishes for your father in law.

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Kris says:
January 28, 2013 at 12:54 pm
I also came across a number of short stories I wrote in high school and college. They’re in a pile so I can go through them and decide if I’m ever going to type them in and share them or just leave them for my own amusement.

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Dorien says:
January 28, 2013 at 1:05 pm
Sweet entry, Kris! (And thanks for the mention!)

Dorien

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Katherine T. says:
January 28, 2013 at 2:23 pm
I wrote in a diary or two as a kid, but no longer have them. I do have some old letters sent to relatives who have since passed on and some from old pen pals from that time. Intereseting to read thru and see ehat I found interesting to write about back then.