Thursday’s Potpourri Blog Post
Posted on March 10, 2016
I’ve been writing about politics lately (presidential and author politics), and some other heavy subjects, so I felt the tiniest bit burned out last night when I sat down to write today’s post. What the hell did I want to say? Did I want to say anything? No. I wanted tea…and a mildly heated up piece of fresh cherry pie. In the end, I made myself a deal that if I got the tea and the pie, I’d write the post. But I also asked my Facebook friends what I should write about. The responses got a bit interesting in a hurry and I’m going to address as many of the suggestions as possible.
Writers block. Yes, Jane, it does deserve the death of 1000 cuts. What do I do about writer’s block? I have a couple of ways that come to mind. First, for each story I work on, I listen to a very specific playlist of music. That way, if I need to get into the mindset for a story quickly, the music brings me right in. Second, Halo. There is something about racking up a huge number of alien kills using every weapon I can get my character’s animated hands on. It helps. Finally, if all else fails, comfort food. A trip to the mall for some hot pretzel sticks with cheddar cheese dip massages my happy place.
Shannon wanted me to talk about horses. I have no idea why or what about them I should mention. I once broke my wrist horseback riding because the saddle broke and I jumped off (as instructed). I ended up graduating high school wearing a cast because of it. Fortunately, it was my left hand and I write right-handed. Unfortunately, I’m left-handed when I do the other thing. Chafe much?
Mr. Wah Wu in California suggested I chat about any sexual misadventures I’ve had. I think those are pretty well-known and hopefully as quickly forgotten. Two come to mind. Prior to dating my husband, I essentially hooked up with a guy and I didn’t entirely know I was hooking up with him. We watched an episode of Star Trek: Voyager together, then he looked over and asked me “Do you want to **** me?” In my innocence, I turned and asked “I don’t know. Do you want to get ******?” He apparently wanted to. The other misadventure involved what I thought was a kinky idea, a bottle of olive oil, and a tarp. NOT one of my better plans and my poor husband didn’t let me live it down for years.
What’s next? Oh, Lord…really Rhonda? Gay men trying straight sex for the first time? Uh, yes, I did that with one girl after college. What I can say about it is whereas women complain that men don’t often listen to them or pay attention, I did. It was because I didn’t know what the hell I was doing, but I paid attention nonetheless. The main problem I encountered is that there was no connection with her. I didn’t feel any chemistry and I can’t be with someone if there’s no chemistry. Plus, you know, I was gay. When I catch myself leering at a picture of her brother while I’m engaging in coitus with her, that’s a less-than-subtle hint we need to move on.
Finally, Jay would like to know the best movies I saw in 2015. Am just going to go through the list in my head. Of course, I saw Star Wars: The Force Awakens, but I had issues with it. Would probably give it a C. What else? Avengers: Age of Ultron (not as good as the first one and it felt rushed), The Martian (I really enjoyed it and I had zero desire to see it), Ant-Man (it was fun, but not great, yet not awful), Jurassic World (weak corporate drivel), Mad Max: Fury Road (LOVED this!!!!), Spectre (so-so), Mission Impossible: Rogue Nation (enjoyed the heck out of this one despite a couple of weak plot points), Spy (hysterical!), Trainwreck (started off funny, then lost its edge in the second half…ugh), Poltergeist (total crap), and The Fantastic Four (a perfect example of a studio needing to leave a director the **** alone and let him sink or swim on his/her own merits/great first half, second half goes to shit after the studio interfered).
And there we have it, Thursday’s post. Did I leave anything out you were burning to know?
Kristoffer Gair (who formerly wrote under the pseudonym Kage Alan) is the Detroit-based author of Honor Unbound, A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To My Sexual Orientation, Andy Stevenson Vs. The Lord Of The Loins, Gaylias: Operation Thunderspell, several short stories featured in anthologies (to be combined in a forthcoming book), the recently re-published novella Falling Awake, its sequel, Falling Awake II: Revenant and Falling Awake III: Requiem.
3 Responses to “Thursday’s Potpourri Blog Post”
Eddie Lam says:
March 10, 2016 at 9:22 am
Interesting blog. It is life. Sometimes, we just don’t have much talk about. But it is ok. Wanna let us know how much you have finished your new coming book? =)
March 10, 2016 at 10:32 am
I think I have a few paragraphs done. lol I am taking my time with this one and making sure it works, and it’s written with tender love and care. It has to be right.
Jane Smith says:
March 11, 2016 at 7:27 am
I always love to read your blog, you never fail to make me smile. Seeing my name in it was very cool and made me do a fan girl squeal lol.