Coming Soon: Tesla Girls, Book Covers and the Ultimate Evil!

Posted on June 10, 2008

“…Tesla Girls…Tesla Girls…I’m in love with Tesla Girls…”

Gotta love OMD and you gotta love the fact these guys got back together some 20 years after parting ways to release a live DVD of one of their classic albums, then deliver another 12 of their delicious hit songs. But seriously, what the hell is a Tesla Girl? If they’re any good, maybe they have brothers? Mmm…Tesla Boys!

Oh, a quick thank you to all the people who’ve added me in the last month! It’s kinda cool telling my boyfriend “Sorry, sweetie, I can’t run out to T.J. Maxx with you. I have almost 700 friends to talk this weekend.” And yes, he usually replies with a sharply ironical taunt or sneering remark (aka sarcasm).

Some of you have seen the book covers I’ve posted in the picture section. Thank you for your feedback on that page and through e-mail. Much appreciated. I’ve got a funny story about the “Andy Stevenson Vs…” cover for you, too.

The publisher told me several months back that they were going to shorten the title to simply “Lord of the Loins” because:

a: the title was too long (I like long titles…yeah, size queen…I can hear you thinking it…and you’re right, which can be evidenced by looking at my guy’s equipment, which you can’t)
b: they could cash in on the whole Lord of the Rings thing…not that anybody would ever, ever, ever cash in on something somebody else already did (pssssst…it’s called “parody”)

So, I gear my entire media/promotion/machine/thing to that title only to receive the cover in e-mail the other day with the original longer title prominently displayed. I sorta win. Am still debating that one because it’s going to confuse a few people who are expecting one thing and getting another. The cover is the same way. It says “gay superhero” when in fact the character in the book is a bit of a teenage version of Calvin from Calvin & Hobbes…if Calvin was gay. I think I’m a little bit like Calvin…if Calvin was gay, poorish, not a twink, listened to OMD and was incredibly well-endowed.

Oh, EVIL alert! Yes, my partner’s Hong Kong Grandmother will be invading in a few short weeks. You know all those ungodly heatwaves, tornadoes, floods, droughts and other unexplained phenomena we’ve been having lately? Don’t call them tragedies or oddities in nature. Let’s just be honest about what they really are; practice. The planet is getting ready for a shift of evil from one hemisphere to the other.

So, watch out and be safe, will ya?

I’ll be posting reminders in the next couple of weeks about the upcoming book launch on the 28th and, if I can manage, I’ll send out personal e-mails to local folks just in case you miss the bulletins. I find that with lots of friends on a page, bulletins go by rather quickly. And almost 700? You people are calling me names for not responding to yours! I sorry. I so sorry.

If it’s any consolation, I’ll let you pick something up for my birthday for me off my Amazon.com wish list! What? Oh, right. That was my bad, not yours. Okay, I’ll let you pick something up for my birthday off my Amazon.com wish list for yourself! You can then let me borrow it…until you forget I have it.

Until the next–as my friend from New York says—brog post, cheers!

Kris

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Kristoffer Gair (who formerly wrote under the pseudonym Kage Alan) is the Detroit-based author of Honor Unbound, A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To My Sexual Orientation, Andy Stevenson Vs. The Lord Of The Loins, Gaylias: Operation Thunderspell, several short stories featured in anthologies (to be combined in a forthcoming book), the recently re-published novella Falling Awake, its sequel, Falling Awake II: Revenant and Falling Awake III: Requiem.

One Response to “Coming Soon: Tesla Girls, Book Covers and the Ultimate Evil!”

Lloyd Songal says:
March 11, 2013 at 3:09 am
Well I’ve completed my Kris marathon today back to January of 2012, and i gotten quite a few chuckles. I enjoyed hearing about how you wedding progressed and a big kick out of references of the Hong Kong Grandmother. You see I have friends in Hong Kong and one friend lives both with his boy friend in Toronto and in H. K. Where he bought a place for both he and his mother so my friend gets the same treatment from his G. M. Whenever they are subjected to each others company. You are a very enjoyable read Kris. Keep up the good work.