My Bum Performs Quality Control Tests
Posted on June 10, 2012
All things considered, I should be a total wreck. Emotionally. One friend’s dementia-suffering mother is back in the hospital under serious circumstances, another’s canine member of the family is in equally serious circumstances, my father continues his own downward spiral journey with Alzheimer’s, the home improvements we’re doing are moving faster than I’d expected, which is causing me some difficulty in keeping up with everything that’s needed and I’m barely getting any writing done. This is all typically a recipe for disaster, yet I’ve been in a fairly good mood during the past two weeks. It’s weird. It’s especially weird because I haven’t touched a Xanax in three months.
It might be helping my mood a little knowing that Ninja III: The Domination is being released on Blu-Ray this week. I’ve been waiting for it for months, decades actually. Yes, it’s a horrible little movie, but those of you who know me know I love my little horrible movies from back in the day. I’m calling it an early birthday gift to myself. Still, one Blu-Ray can influence one’s mood only so much.
Maybe it’s because, despite the sheer amount of physical work I’m doing, I feel like I’m accomplishing something with the house. I have to tell you, the new carpet and the paint job in the rooms I’ve been able to clear makes it look like an entirely brand new home. The hubby and I were blown away by how good the place looks. Not that it ever looked bad before. It was his father’s home. Now it’s ours. And it’s starting to reflect the change in management. We’re piecing it together one room at a time. I’d hoped to break it down into Phase I and Phase II and while I was successful with Phase I, I simply ran out of places to put everything. I’ve not got Phase II broken down so that it flows into a Phase III.
It’s a juggling game, however, and full of challenges. In order for A to happen, B needs to be scheduled and then C has to be completed. However, B must be given a week’s notice to line up and only after C has been allowed time to plan yadda yadda yadda. Okay, it’s a headache, but it when it comes together? Magic. A pain in the ass, but magic.
Painter is completing his work on four rooms tomorrow, am still waiting to find out if Carpet Guy can come this week, the kitchen is being ripped out tomorrow (so no kitchen for two weeks), Electrician is coming on Wednesday or Thursday and the kitchen cabinets are still being worked on in the garage where I can’t store either of the vehicles right now. Once Carpet Guy does his thing (which I continue to hope is this week), I can vacuum those room, then stuff them full with what’s currently stacked in the family room and get that ready for painting and carpeting.
Yes, I am becoming the ultimate project manager. No, I have no desire to do this again. I want to write, damn it! I want to complete more books and give my husband dirty looks when he asks if I want to move again anytime soon!
The couch arrived last Friday. We’d looked for couches at many, many places before deciding we liked the one at IKEA. However, as with most things at IKEA, there’s some “assembly required.” Our couch looked so nice and tiny in the store despite is ability to keep us comfortable. I anticipated its arrival would be like childbirth; a deliver person (stork) would drop it off in our living room and it would magically grow and serve us. Not so. It arrived in four ridiculous large boxes. I unpacked each box starting with number 1 and going all the way to number 4. The directions were in box 4. Doesn’t that crap figure?
Well, it took me two days to assemble and not without some discomfort. There was a 5th box to boot, which was the ottoman. It doesn’t look horrible at all. There’s just so much of it! I mean…this is one gigantic couch. Painter came upstairs Saturday after I’d emptied out the kitchen, took one look at me and asked “You’re sitting down?” I hadn’t sat for two days or so it felt.
“Yes,” I informed him. “I’m performing a quality control inspection on the couch.”
My ass wasn’t moving, not for an hour.
So yes, I’m in a good mood lately and have no real right to be. I won’t question it, though. There are times I’m in a good mood because I run into someone who isn’t and needs a lift. Maybe I’m just gearing myself up for that.
How about you? How are you on this Monday?
Kristoffer Gair (who formerly wrote under the pseudonym Kage Alan) is the Detroit-based author of Honor Unbound, A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To My Sexual Orientation, Andy Stevenson Vs. The Lord Of The Loins, Gaylias: Operation Thunderspell, several short stories featured in anthologies (to be combined in a forthcoming book), the recently re-published novella Falling Awake, its sequel, Falling Awake II: Revenant and Falling Awake III: Requiem.
7 Responses to “My Bum Performs Quality Control Tests”
June 10, 2013 at 8:39 am
Having a sense of accomplishment makes even the hardest work easier, and while you’ve got a humungus lot to do, the fact that you can actually see the results is great. Please post photos of the entire house when it’s done,
June 10, 2013 at 9:17 am
I’ve been wanting to post a couple of pics, but every time one section is done, it’s filled up with things from another section that isn’t. In fact, once the three bedrooms are painted (which will be finished today) and then carpeted (hopefully this week), I have to move everything from other areas of the house directly there in order to get those areas ready for painting and carpeting. It’s crazy.
Max Vos says:
June 10, 2013 at 8:42 am
I loved doing my home renovation. I totally understand the sitting down for an hour. LOL You’ll love it in the end. Warning: It can become addictive. 😉
June 10, 2013 at 9:18 am
I brought Blu-Rays to play today. Why? Because as hard as I’ll be working, it’ll force me to look up once in a while and exclaim “Squirrel!”
Joelle Casteel says:
June 11, 2013 at 8:11 am
Well the fact that I’m not reading this until Tuesday morning 😀
ugh, project manager. sometimes I’m glad my Master isn’t too big on decorating of any sort lol
but Monday, the Wii Fit controller ran out of charge my workout was cut early- urgh. one thing after another was met with a “I didn’t expect you to be doing that so long.” Yup, I was having most un-submissive thoughts at various points.
But most definitely, Kris- I’m having a “just let me write and leave me alone” feeling that started yesterday and is in high force still this morning. And I’m actually resenting the notion of needing to promote my blog post ugh
June 12, 2013 at 12:04 pm
Promoting a blog post isn’t entirely bad. I think it can be kind of fun, especially when folks leave feedback. That’s kind of the icing on the cake. Just remember to have fun with it whenever possible. It’s meant to be fun. And when it’s not, try hot pretzel sticks with cheddar cheese.
Joelle Casteel says:
June 12, 2013 at 12:19 pm
true, and promoting isn’t really all that music work. I think using Twitter is the hardest for me- I’m still not good at the word count and have to struggle to edit down to the max characters.
well I was just a bad vegan this morning and had a veggie/omelet bagel sandwich as reward for having to take teen’s laptop to the store to hopefully be fixed. heh yes, not to take oneself too seriously