Together: A Little Piece of Heaven in a Blu-Ray World

Posted on August 11, 2011

My co-workers and I stepped out to lunch on Tuesday and caught part of an episode of Family Feud. The question was “Name something you’d see when you pass away.” Five of the answers made sense, but the last one? Not so much. We all thought it would be relatives. It was clouds. Clouds? Hell, you can go outside and see that for free now. Why would you think of those when you pass? So I wondered what would I think of in a similar situation. Probably my guy. He is and always has been a shining star in my life. To this day, I look at him, memorize every bit of his face, his eyes, his smile…and then he opens his mouth. That’s usually when Heaven ends and the little devil comes out to play. Yes, he’s his Hong Kong Grandmother’s grandson alright.

It’s funny. I’ve always suspected that Heaven has been in front of us the entire time, only we can’t see it with our eyes. We have to be free of our human eyes in order to see that it’s right there, right in our sky. Maybe it’s just the writer in me, but wouldn’t it be amazing if I was right? As for bits of Heaven on earth–aside from some of the music of Belinda Carlisle–I think we have moments.

For instance, I love watching my guy sleep. I’ve learned to watch him because he raises his arm while modeling in his sleep and keeps his elbow poised over my face at any given hour. It’s a bit of a minor miracle I haven’t gotten a black eye when the bloody thing drops on me, which is rare. Anyway, aside from the imminent threat of nocturnal physical violence, it’s usually the time I see him most at peace. And when he turns over with his back to me, I just slide over, he lifts his head up, I slip my arm under and pull up tightly to him. He smiles when I do this. It’s only a reaction, but it’s nice to know that even unconscious, he knows I’m there and he likes it.

There are rare times when he’s had a pretty awful day or week and just being near me gives him some amount of comfort. I hate that he’s had a crappy week, but I like knowing that when he does, I’m who he wants to be with. It means I’ve done something right over the past 16 1/2 years. Of course, when the doofus eats 2 1/2 ice cream sundaes, is sick to his stomach and ever so romantically tells me when I put my arm around him “Don’t touch me or I’m going to throw up”, at least I know he still finds comfort with my being in the room with him.

Okay, and a little piece of Heaven for me is something I do when he has his elbow poised in the air over my head. He has a very ticklish forehead, so I’ll very gently and slowly swipe my finger across it. He rubs it, then continues his sleep modeling career. As soon as the elbow has resumed its position over me, I swipe again, only a a tiny bit harder. He itches. Up goes the elbow. I swipe quickly. He smacks himself and wakes up wondering why, then turns over. I pull up, he lifts his head and we cuddle with him never being the wiser for it. See? Heaven.

We’ve had many adventures together, gone many places and seen a number of things, but it’s still just the beginning. There’s so much yet to do and see. Together. And one day when it’s time to move on to the next part of what comes next, we’ll explore that, too. Together.

I wonder if they have Blu-Rays in Heaven… Who says you can’t take them with you?

Hug noises,

Kris

PS: Hope to see you in LA this Saturday at 5pm at Book Soup for the next signing with G.A. Hauser!

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Kristoffer Gair (who formerly wrote under the pseudonym Kage Alan) is the Detroit-based author of Honor Unbound, A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To My Sexual Orientation, Andy Stevenson Vs. The Lord Of The Loins, Gaylias: Operation Thunderspell, several short stories featured in anthologies (to be combined in a forthcoming book), the recently re-published novella Falling Awake, its sequel, Falling Awake II: Revenant and Falling Awake III: Requiem.

4 Responses to “Together: A Little Piece of Heaven in a Blu-Ray World”

Dorien Grey says:
August 11, 2011 at 10:44 am
Envy is not one of our nobler emotions, but every time I hear you talk of Ralph and your relationship, my chest aches with envy. You’re a lucky, lucky man.

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Kris says:
August 11, 2011 at 1:23 pm
No reason to be. We’re right where we belong. If we were with anybody else, we’d be making their lives a living hell, but we’d be enjoying it.

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Carol says:
August 11, 2011 at 7:52 pm
Now this made my day. I LOVE his ‘sleep modeling’…how adorable.
But this is what it’s all about, and my heart smiles so big to see someone care enough about someone to express this. Nothing earth shattering or monumental. Just…As Piglet said to Pooh, that feeling of being ‘sure of you.’

Thank you for making the smiles~

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Gabi says:
August 11, 2011 at 8:43 pm
“There is no key to happiness. The door is always open” Nice blog Kris!